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HoW To KeEp A hEaLtHy LeVeL Of SaNiTy AnD dRiVe OtHeR PeOpLe iNsAnE...

Discussion in 'The Coffee Shop ~ Chit Chat' started by SurrealOne, Jan 8, 2012.

  1. SurrealOne

    SurrealOne Former Member ROTM Winner 1000 Posts

    HoW To KeEp A hEaLtHy LeVeL Of SaNiTy AnD dRiVe OtHeR PeOpLe iNsAnE...
    1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car and point a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
    2. Page yourself over the intercom. (Don't disguise your voice.)
    3. Find out where your boss shops and buy exactly the same outfits.
    4. Always wear them one day after your boss does. (This is especially effective if your boss is the opposite gender.)
    5. Send e-mail to the rest of the company to tell them what you're doing. For example: 'If anyone needs me, I'll be in the bathroom.'
    6. Put mosquito netting around your work area.
    7. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.
    8. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it 'IN'.
    9. Develop an unnatural fear of staplers.
    10. Send e-mail messages that advertise free pizza, doughnuts, etc., in the break are. When people complain that there was nothing there, lean back, rub your stomach, and say, "You've got to be faster than that."
    11. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
    12. In the memo field of all your checks, write 'for sexual favors'.
    13. Reply to everything someone says with, "That's what you think."
    14. Finish all your sentences with "in accordance with the prophecy."
    15. Don't use any punctuation
    16. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
    17. Ask people what sex they are.
    18. Specify that your drive-through order is 'to go'.
    19. Go to the opera and sing along.
    20. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.

  2. aloxdaddy99

    aloxdaddy99 New Member 1000 Posts

    I used to always tell the person in the drive thru that I wanted it to go.
  3. Coach24

    Coach24 New Member 1000 Posts

    This some funny stuff , no doubt got a few angry folks along the way but hey can't they take a joke?

    My dad got a great idea one night while riding in my '63 Chevy pickup. He took my very powerful hand held spotlight and put red wrapping paper over it and started shining at cars that were going to slow in front of us. Man he never laughed so hard and we had at least 30-40 cars pull over so I could keep my speed up. We had a blast in those days. these days everyone is too uptight.
  4. SurrealOne

    SurrealOne Former Member ROTM Winner 1000 Posts

    I've actually done 7, 8, 10, 12, 13, 14, and 18. I'm not bold enough to try some of the others (and, as noted, people are too uptight these days).
  5. 747

    747 New Member

    Im going to do this next time!!!

    Im also going to page myself on the radio at work. I cant wait to hear people key in and see what they say.
  6. GMCErica

    GMCErica New Member Platinum Contributor 1000 Posts

    Hahaha!!! Your hilarious S!! I have done a few things on that list... Hairdryer no, but radar yes!! and people go crazy and panic....LOL
  7. Coach24

    Coach24 New Member 1000 Posts

    So how much them der radar guns cost lassie?
  8. GMCErica

    GMCErica New Member Platinum Contributor 1000 Posts

    I don't buy them, i just use them... the new ones with the lasers are expensive... What a fun piece of equipment... LOL makes people crap their pants... hahaha!
  9. Coach24

    Coach24 New Member 1000 Posts

    Do you sell black market Charmin for those Charmin moments?

    ---------- Post added at 07:28 PM ---------- Previous post was at 07:27 PM ----------

    How to piss off one BC peace officer> Go to her GM girls only post and post, if you are a male:rofl::rofl::rofl:

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