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Win Shocks from AutoAnything on GMTC! Official Entry Thread!

Discussion in 'AutoAnything' started by ChevyFan, Jun 18, 2012.

  1. ChevyFan

    ChevyFan Administrator Staff Member

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    AutoAnything.com is teaming up with GMTC for another great giveaway ONLY for members of GMTC.

    Win a Set of Shocks from AutoAnything

    How To Enter
    AutoAnything is giving away a set of shocks (winner's choice) to one member who (1) replies to this thread with a joke (see below) and (2) clicks the like button on AutoAnything's Facebook Page.

    The joke must be tasteful, PG-13 or less, not related to politics, race or religion or otherwise violate the rules of this website. Come on, use your heads. Also, only one entry is going to count for each person.

    Contest begins now and ends Midnight on July 4, 2012 Central Time. We will choose one member at random. Please don't hate or complain in this post, if you don't want to participate according to these rules then don't post anything.

    bilstein_heavy_duty_shocks.jpg skyjacker_nitro_8000_shocks_all_shocks.jpg

    Head over to http://www.autoanything.com/<wbr>suspensi...0A50472A1.aspx to see the vast selection of shocks that AutoAnything carries for your daily driver. AutoAnything now carries Bilstein 5100 series shocks.

    The next time you need new accessories or parts for your Chevy or any other vehicle you might own, remember to head over to AutoAnything for the best deals around!

    This contest is sponsored by AutoAnything, rules are subject to change without notice. Winner will be notified on this forum and any prize not claimed in 7 days will be forfeited. Contest winner will win a set of four (4) shocks of his/her choice on the AutoAnything website link listed in this promotion, some items including air shocks are excluded. Full list of exclusions kept by AutoAnything representatives. Winner must provide name, contact and shipping information to receive prize. Some restrictions apply, no cash value, no substitutions.
    Last edited: Jul 2, 2012
    #1
  2. Sierraowner5.3

    Sierraowner5.3 New Member

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    A Really Bad Day

    There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour.

    Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry."

    "No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police said that they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away."

    "I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar. And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison."

    ******

    thought this was a good one.

    Alex
    #2
  3. aloxdaddy99

    aloxdaddy99 New Member

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    Man all the good jokes are out!! I need a new set of rears to go with the kings on the front. I am really going to have to think about this one.

    Alex that was a good start.
    #3
  4. Ape

    Ape New Member

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    How's this????? :happy:

    [​IMG]
    #4
  5. sfdefender24

    sfdefender24 New Member

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    I cant really think of any right now with me being in afghanistan and not getting sleep...the only joke i can think of as of right now is FORD!!! i had to do it....
    #5
  6. Curky

    Curky New Member

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    <o:p></o:p>
    One day a duck went into a hardware store and asked the owner for some duck food. The owner looked at him funny, and said, This is a hardware store and we don’t carry duck food." The next day the duck came back to the hardware store an again asked the owner for some duck food. The owner, disturbed that the duck came back, said, I told you yesterday. This is a hardware store; we do not have any duck food! If you come back and ask for duck food again I will cement your feet in the ground!" So the next say the duck came back again and said, Do you have any cement?" "No, said the storeowner. Then, the duck said, Do you have any duck food?"

    I already like you on face book
    #6
  7. ChromeSilver02

    ChromeSilver02 New Member

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    Since I am an engineer, I'll share one that I enjoyed when I heard it:

    An engineer dies and goes to hell. After a while, the engineer gets dissatisfied with the level of comfort in there and starts designing and building improvements. After a while, hell has air conditioning, flushing toilets, water fountains and escalators - making the engineer a pretty popular guy.

    One day God phones Satan up and asks with a sneer: “Hey buddy, how’s it goin down there in hell?”

    Satan snickered back, “Things are going great actually. We’ve got air conditioning, flush toilets, escalators and the works. Hell (no pun intended), there’s no telling what this engineer guy is gonna come up with next.”

    God replies, “What? You’ve got an engineer? That’s a mistake - he should never have gotten down there; send him back up.”

    To which Satan replied, “No way dude. I like having an engineer on staff, I’m keepin him.”

    God retorted, “Send him back up here or I’ll sue.”

    Satan laughs loudly and answers, “Yeah, right. And just where are you gonna find a lawyer?”
    #7
  8. rileyjr16

    rileyjr16 New Member

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    A cardiologist died and was given an elaborate funeral. A huge Heart covered in flowers stood behind the casket during the service.

    Following the eulogy, the heart opened, and the casket rolled inside. The heart then closed, sealing the doctor in the beautiful heart forever.

    At that point, one of the mourners burst into laughter.

    When all eyes stared at him, he said, 'I'm sorry, I was just thinking of my own funeral......I'm a gynecologist.'

    The proctologist fainted.
    #8
  9. aloxdaddy99

    aloxdaddy99 New Member

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    Riley that is funny!!!
    #9
  10. Salesguy1980

    Salesguy1980 Member

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    Q. What do you get when you cross a kangaroo and an elephant?

    A. Holes all over Australia, hahaha

    Heard this one at a cub scout camping trip with my son a few weeks ago
    #10
  11. AutoAnything

    AutoAnything New Member

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    Hilarious:rofl: , keep em coming everyone!!
    #11
  12. SurrealOne

    SurrealOne Former Member

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    A driver is stuck in a traffic jam on the highway outside of Washington, D.C. Nothing is moving. Unexpectedly, a man on foot knocks on the driver's window. The driver rolls down the window and asks, "What's going on?"

    The man on foot replies, "Terrorists have locked all of Congress inside the Capital Building and they're demanding a 100 million dollar ransom. If the government fails to pay, the terrorists claim they will douse their hostages in gasoline and set them all on fire. Some of us are going from car-to-car collecting donations."

    "How much is everyone giving, on average?" the driver asks.

    The man on foot replies, "Roughly a gallon."
    #12
  13. Curky

    Curky New Member

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    WHY ARE THERE SIDEWALKS BESIDE MOST STREETS AND HIWAYS?

    So Ford owners have a safe place to walk home. :rofl::rofl::rofl::party:<o:p></o:p>
    #13
  14. rileyjr16

    rileyjr16 New Member

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    A priest, a thief and an engineer are all slated to be executed by guillotine. The priest is to be dispatched first and the executioner asks him:

    “How do you want to face on the guillotine?”

    The priest responds:

    “With my face up, looking toward heaven.”

    The executioner accedes and the priest is laid face up on the guillotine. The executioner pulls the cord; the blade drops, and then miraculously stops within mere inches of the priest’s neck. The gathered witnesses gasp in astonishment. Everybody agrees that it is a miracle and sign of divine intervention and the priest’s life is spared.

    The thief is next. When the executioner asks how he’d like to be positioned the thief responds:

    “With my face up, looking toward heaven.”

    The executioner complies, and the thief is laid down face up. The cord is pulled. The blade falls, and, as
    with the priest the blade stops inches from the thief’s neck. Again the witnesses gasp. They can understand
    a miracle occurring with the priest but with a thief! Nonetheless, they take it as a sign from God, and release
    the thief.

    Finally, it’s the engineer’s turn. Like the other two he wishes to be executed face up, looking toward heaven. The executioner lays him down, but before he can pull the cord the engineer yells out:

    “Stop! Stop!”

    The executioner pauses, and the engineer, looking up at the guillotine says, “I think I see the problem.”
    #14
  15. rileyjr16

    rileyjr16 New Member

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    A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he's doing a show in a small club in a small town in Arkansas. With his dummy on his knee, he's going through his usual dumb blonde jokes when a blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her chair and starts shouting: "I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What does the color of a person's hair have to do with her worth as a human being? It's guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in the community and from reaching our full potential as a person, because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against, not only blondes, but women in general...
    and all in the name of humor!" The ventriloquist is embarrassed and begins to apologize, when the blonde yells, "You stay out of this, mister! I'm talking to that little jerk on your knee!"
    #15
  16. rileyjr16

    rileyjr16 New Member

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    One day, a Catholic priest, Al Gore, of course the pilot, and a boy scout were on a plane. A little while into their flight, the pilot came to the back and said, "Look I got some bad news, we're going down. And worse I only got 3 parachutes. But since I'm the pilot and I'm important, I'm taking one and jumping", so he took one and jumped. Al Gore said, "Well I'm the world's smartest man, I'm very important, so he jumped too." The priest looked at the boy scout and said, "Son, I've devoted my life to the Lord and served him well, I'm about ready to meet him, so you take the last parachute and don't worry about me." The boy scout looked up at the priest and said, "Don't worry Padre, we can both jump, the 'world's smartest man' just took off with my knapsack."
    #16
  17. UpsetProps

    UpsetProps New Member

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    Why did the scarecrow win the Nobel Prize?
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    He was out standing in his field.
    #17
  18. Jper

    Jper New Member

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    Two University students spend the night before their exams partying and living up their final days of school. The next day they wake up from their hangover and discover that they're over an hour late for their English exam, in a panic they rush to class in one car and plan to tell their professor that they had a flat tire. When they arrive the Professor is watching over the class and sternly lectures the students about being prepared, they tell him of the flat tire and he agrees that would be an acceptable solution. Asking one student to take a seat at the back and the other a seat at the front he takes a pen and two sheets of paper from his desk, quickly scribes out the exam question hands one to the student in the front and one to the back, each of them starting to relax as they settle in, until they turn over their test to the question. "Which Tire?"
    #18
  19. AMac

    AMac New Member

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    One day a blonde was driving on the highway and got pulled over by a cop. The cop said "Why do you keep swerving?" The blonde replied "I turn one way and there's a tree, I turn again there's a tree, and then there's a whole bunch more trees popping out of nowhere." The cop replied "You retard that's your air freshener."
    #19
  20. kw70chevy

    kw70chevy New Member

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    A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says ,"Ughh, That's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her ,"The driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go up there and tell him off. Go on I'll hold your monkey for you."
    #20

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