Recently I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D - Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder. This is how it manifests itself:
I decided to water my garden.
As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I looked over at my car and decided my car needs washing.
As I started toward the garage, I noticed that there is mail on the porch table that I brought up from the mailbox earlier.
I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.
I lay my car keys down on the table, put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table, and notice that the can is full.
So I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the garbage first.
But then I think, since I am going to be near the mailbox when I take out the garbage anyway, I may as well pay the bills first.
I take my checkbook off the table, and see that there is only 1 check left. My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go inside the house to my desk where I find a can of Coke that I had been drinking.
I am going to look for my checks, but first I need to push the Coke aside so that I don't accidentally knock it over. I see that the Coke is getting warm, and I decide I should put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold.
As I head toward the kitchen with the Coke, a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye. They need to be watered.
I set the Coke down on the counter, and I discover my reading glasses that I have been searching for all morning. Then I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I am going to water the flowers.
I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with water and suddenly I spot the TV remote. Someone left it on the kitchen table. I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I will be looking for the remote, but I will not remember that it is on the table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first I will water the flowers.
I pour some water in the flowers, but quite a bit of it spilled on the floor. So, I set the remote back on the table, get some towels and wipe up the spill, then, I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.
At the end of the day:
the car isn't washed,
the bills aren't paid,
there is a warm can of Coke sitting on the counter,
the flowers don't have enough water,
there is still only 1 check in my checkbook,
I can't find the remote,
I can't find my glasses,
and I don't remember what in the word I did with the car keys!
Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I am really baffled, because I know I was busy all day long, and I am really tired.
Don't laugh - if this isn't you yet, your day is coming!!!
P.S. I just walked outside and someone left the water running in the driveway!!
Growing older is mandatory.
Growing up is optional.
Laughing at yourself is therapeutic.